20 Main Reasons Why You’re Still Single (3 of 5)

Some ways to meet people in a healthy setting

One should always try to meet in a comfortable setting, without the need for being intoxicated. Maybe go to a recreational activity together like dancing classes, yoga or meditation center or some cooking class. The options are many.

Remove the rejection fear

Dating is a way of testing the compatibility of a person, and the process of rejection just makes it simpler. It’s a common phenomenon for getting denied to, insulted too, or not getting answered to, but remember, if it would have continued, it would be you who would suffer in the future. So just calm down and give it a shot.

Get a dog

As typical as it may sound, you should get a dog for companionship. A dog immensely helps in the mental and emotional aspects of a lonely person. For the people who are unsure of a human relationship or broken heart, a dog may just be the right trick for you. A dog will drag you out of your place to go for a walk. Although you may hate it at the start, you’ll start developing a bond that will remain permanent. The best part is you’ll never feel lonely and will always have someone by your side with loads of unconditional love.

Taking the dog on a walk in the park also opens a new door to meet new people. The love that a dog can give will outweigh the hassle you may be carrying out for them. Moreover, owning a dog positively enhances your character as a responsible, caring and loving person. And these qualities are what a person looks for in the other person. Also, they make you approachable, and people would want to come and pet your dog. It is cliché but never fails to work.

You don’t feel the need for being in a relationship

Many people come up on their own, given the conditions on which they grew on, they feel they understand the meaning of life better and really have a different meaning of companionship in life. They know they can hold themselves strong and responsible for everything they do and hence, they become completely self-reliant.

Physical attachment and sense of intimacy is something that we acquire from our parents. The way they interact with us usually becomes the way we deal with intimacy. The way of intimacy gets hardwired in our brains from the way of living of our guardians which may be of survival instinct or empathic.

For the guardians who themselves are fighting their demons, addictions, or maybe from lagging on the socio-economic aspect, the child is compelled to face them too. He or she may get involved in the violent atrocities that will scar their minds forever. This leads to underdevelopment for the emotional strata of their personalities. If this base gets damaged, the whole tree grows up to be a weak one.

It is better to find a good therapeutic service that can help you rekindle that empathic flame again in you. They will teach you the actual way of behaving and making a connection with fellow human beings.

Growing up in a normal society gains us the valuable emotional and social balance required to sustain healthy well-being in a society. However, if this environment is unstable and violent, a similar mindset is usually cemented in minds. Thus, you must learn to tolerate the discrepancies among the people and try to create a good balance between them all.

Similarly, one should know the boundaries of other people and act well upon them. Like, do start running before you learn to walk, similarly, certain things in relationships should not be forced and must be allowed to act accordingly with the pace of time.

One should learn to make relationships in real life and not just through online media. Maybe invite someone over some coffee, or just Netflix and chill. One should be genuine and real to oneself, which usually gets compromised. The interactions should be made more physical rather than virtual. Just take it to step by step, neither too larger, nor too small, just as they can.

If not at once, take small steps, and develop your relationship by being real. And as you develop a relationship with friends, the more and more you will start feeling comfortable, the more trust develops and then maybe you become more open to share your feelings.

The way a relationship grows is similar to beginning learning in life. Firstly, our infancy is taken care of by our parents. This is the pre-schooling of our life. Then comes our relationship with our siblings and first friends. This is the schooling part. This makes our first intimate relationship as graduation. On a similar basis, we complete the schooling in relationship building as we progress in life.

Some of the top reasons you may still be single is because:

• You’re too much selective and deem no one worthy enough for you.
• You’re not much selective and pretty much go on with anyone without ever testing for compatibility.
• You’re in the wrong place at the wrong time looking for the wrong person. This can be explained by a person visiting a Bar to meet new people, which are flawed as people are not in their true selves in a non-sober state.
• You are haunted by a childhood trauma that occurred with you that has scarred you for life. This, in fact, is a serious issue and must be dealt with therapeutic services.
• You’ve had broken hearts from cheating people which just makes you trust anyone less than usual, and makes you avoid commitment and care for the fear of losing it again.
• You’ve treated yourself very vaguely hence people assume you have low self-esteem or confidence, and hence are easily withdrawn from you on every possible level, and so that no one else is drawn to you.

And for the people, who are still single, owing to themselves, are for the following reasons:

• They favor people who usually are not compatible emotionally and also physically.
• They often want to get involved with people who are at the moment, are not really interested in a relationship as well as in them too.
• They let pass the obvious negative signs people believe that they can change a person for good; however, they should also consider their own well-being, which may turn out to be changed.
• They often ignore the initial red flags, believing that they are capable of changing the other person. This sets them up for disappointment in the long run, ultimately.