11 Science-Based Tips To Make Your First Date A Perfect One (3 of 3)

Show Interest In Others’ Lives

No matter what you think about yourself, if you want people to be interested in your life, you need to show them you are interested in theirs. Regardless of who you are, you no doubt love talking about yourself. Well, so does everyone else on the planet who can talk.

By asking your date questions about them, you’re showing overall that you’re interested in getting to know them. That, in turn, makes you a more interesting person. Being aloof might look good on a magazine, but it has no real baring in the real world.

On top of this, you want to be showing interest beyond your date. You also want to be interested in the topics that come up. It’s great to be curious about the world and about topics. So if your date brings up a topic that you know nothing about, don’t feel alienated or that the date is doomed. Instead ask them for more information.

This shows that you’re curious about the subject and that’ll make you more attractive in your date’s eyes.

All of this comes back to the psychology of attraction. The idea of this is that these tactics are able to bypass the brain’s naturally short attention span. The psychology of attraction dictates three things must be done: to be intriguing, interesting, and engaging.

Through that, you’ll be able to hold your date’s attention and they’ll also be attracted to you.

If you’re struggling to understand what it means to be interested – it’s all a matter of asking questions. We’ve mentioned some questions above, which are good, but here are some others to consider.

Remember That An Ideal Match Doesn’t Need Perfect Compatibility

Sometimes our own expectations in our head can get the better of us in life. When thinking about our ideal person to date, the reality is – they don’t exist. We often set the bar too high that our judgement gets clouded. Why is that the case? Well, because all people have flaws. There will be things that you’re not going to like about them. However, many different faults that people have can be often made up by having strong and good traits.

Our point of all this is that you should have expectations, but do keep in mind that it may take a while to see if things work out. If you’re looking for someone that’s more creative in life, don’t be quick to dismiss them if they have a job as a computer programmer or even an accountant.

At the end of the day, relationships are about sacrifices and sometimes you need to sacrifice old ways of thinking, so that you can settle with something more realistic. In those situations it’s not about setting lower standards or anything, but rather doing these because you know other parts are clicking.

If you’re able to hang out at coffee shops and talk for hours on end, it shows that you’re more compatible regardless of what each other’s professional backgrounds are like. In fact, if both people are naturally curious and interested in one another, that’s way better than matching all of the ideals that one another has for their ideal partner.

Want some more facts on compatibility? Studies show that less compatible couples are able to withstand many of life’s difficulties easier.

Write Your Own Framework

The last tip we want to leave you with is to write your own framework. When a date goes wrong or a relationship crumbles, we often jump to extreme conclusions. Things like not being able to find a suitable dating partner or that no one likes you any longer.

It’s so easy to get into that negativity and some part of the reason stems from our own environment. We have family members and friends who are in happy relationships.

They make it seem so easy.

The truth of the matter is that it’s not easy to find the love of your life. Like with any goal you want to reach, sometimes it requires you to do some self-reflection and prepare yourself for when that day comes. The day you reach that goal you’ve been working towards.

If you’re struggling to find the love of your life, one thing you can consider is to look at your own expectations and to create a framework for yourself. It doesn’t require you to change your appearance or personality. Rather it requires a level of self-awareness and what you truly want to be getting out of dating and out of a relationship.