6 Healthy Relationship Beliefs That Most People Assume Are Toxic (3 of 4)

4. It’s normal to feel attracted to others

In relationships where the couple aren’t honest with themselves, the notion that you would ever have an emotional or sexual attraction to somebody other than your partner is tantamount to blasphemy. People who are in stable marriages and relationships often feel blindsided and guilty when their eyes wander. But let’s face it: we are biologically-driven to find different people interesting and even sexually appealing. In fact, novelty and curiosity is precisely what attracted us to our partner in the first place. When someone flirts with us and we find ourselves enjoying it, it isn’t a sign that there is anything wrong in the relationship. But it’s actually a natural, healthy reaction and not something you should suppress. However, the choice you do have in the matter is to not act out on these impulses.

5. It’s fruitless to try to “fix” their shortcomings or deny these flaws exist

There is no such thing as the perfect man or woman. When it comes to relationships, this can be somewhat of a bitter pill to swallow, especially if we convince ourselves that the ideal person is out there waiting to be discovered. There are two ways people typically respond to this: they either try to change their partner or they convince themselves that, no, their partner really is perfect. Both of these approaches lead to dysfunction. The best way to gauge how much you love somebody is by how you feel about their flaws. The sign of true intimacy is if you accept or even embrace their more adorable quirks.