What Truly Matters in Relationships: 8 Insights That Change Everything (4 of 5)

6. Choose to See the Best in Them

When it comes to interactions with your partner, what you choose to focus on is what ultimately sticks out. Thus, if you are constantly pointing out their flaws and weaknesses, those are the characteristics that dominate your perception of them. On the other hand, if you’re putting all of your energy into recognizing their best traits, those positive behaviors get reinforced. Whether you admire their sense of humor, their kindness, strength, or creativity, make it a habit to appreciate these things. They’ll respond by appreciating the good qualities you possess.

7. Listen to Understand, Not Respond

One of the reasons romantic partners get into heated arguments is because they’re so focused on formulating a response even before they’ve given the other party a chance to finish what they’re wanting to say. As a result, such replies come off as hostile, defensive, and not the least bit tactful. Avoid interrupting, fixing, or judging. Hear them out. True listening means putting your own thoughts aside and being present with what’s being said.