4 Effective Ways To Respond To The Negativity of Others (2 of 3)

2. Listen, but understand that you don’t have to reply

Imagine this scenario that actually happened to a friend of mine: it’s your last day of work with your employer. After a few years of gaining much-needed skills and experience, you’ve decided it is time to strike out on your own and start a new business. As you are saying your parting words, a colleague you barely know pulls you aside and says, “Take it from me. You’ll eventually run out of work.” She says this because of her own experiences with trying to go solo. She was fortunate to find a loyal customer who gave her a bunch of projects to keep her going. But one day there was nothing, and this caused a huge financial burden. 

Although this happened a couple of decades ago, my friend still remembers this encounter because it seemed like the worst possible thing somebody could say to him at that moment. After all, quitting a job and leaving your respected co-workers and supervisors behind to try to find success on your own can be scary. But he simply responded by nodding and not letting it get to him. In fact, he even found a lesson from all this, which was to build a large, steady client base rather than depend on one customer. This is obviously a more difficult route, but one that increases the odds of success.

3. Happiness isn’t selfishness

Imagine going on a vacation that makes you happy. Perhaps you went scuba diving with dolphins off the coast of Africa. Or you climbed a mountain in South America. Then you counter someone who says, “I could never do that. I guess I just don’t like myself that much.” You might simply not respond, which is fine. Or you might say something like, “I think you’re being way too hard on yourself.”

In many cases, when you are getting the most out of life and feeling unapologetically happy, others will insist that you’re being selfish. Although it is true that you should never seek happiness if it comes at the expense of the happiness of others, if you aren’t causing any harm, there is nothing wrong with doing things that make you happy. In fact, you have an obligation to do whatever it takes to be happy! You’ll discover that when you’re happy, you become a better friend, partner, and worker. In other words, it helps you maximize your potential as a person.