10 Reasons Why People in Long-Term Relationships Call It Quits
We can all remember getting into a relationship that we were confident would end happily ever after… only to have it come to a sad end. Why does this happen, especially when we invest so much into our relationships and are seemingly compatible enough for it to have lasted for years? Some of the answers might downright shock you! Not really.
1. The sex has stopped
There’s nothing worse than a sexless relationship. In fact, that sounds like an oxymoron to us! If you aren’t having any sex or at least not enough of it, it’s bound to fizzle at some point. After all, intimacy is an essential way for couples to connect. Once all of that stops, the person is no longer a lover and instead feels more like a roommate.
2. Fighting over finances
Money and expenses are highly complicated things when you’re single, but especially when you’re in a relationship. One of the pair feels like they’re disproportionately responsible for paying the bills. Or the couple has a joint bank account where one of them makes big purchases without consulting the other. Failure to sit down and hammer out these finance issues before they become a serious problem dooms the vast majority of relationships.
3. The kids have grown up
Surprisingly, a lot of couples stayed together for 20 years simply because they didn’t want their children to grow up with divorced parents. But once their offspring spread their wings and left the house, their parents decided it was the perfect time to finally end the marriage.
4. A failure to communicate
The key to success in any relationship is the ability to talk things out and develop ways to solve problems together. Once either or both parties stop doing this — or decide they’d rather shout instead of having a reasonable discussion — that’s the end of that.
5. Not compromising
Even if couples attempt to hash things out by talking, their relationship is dunzo if they stubbornly refuse to compromise. It is simply impossible for one of the pair to get their own way 100% of the time.
Infidelity seemed to be one of the most common responses on the Reddit thread. The spark in the relationship just wasn’t there anymore; they were overcome by temptation and found a lady (or dude) on the side; they either decided at some point to confess, or they were caught in the act.
7. Problems with compatibility
It goes without saying that the relationship won’t last if you have nothing in common. No hobbies or interests. You’ll quickly run out of things to talk about, or talk about stuff that your partner finds completely boring.
8. Something terrible happens that the relationship can’t overcome
There were also plenty of stories about couples that were able to deal with almost every problem together, and then a difficult situation happens that causes the relationship to unravel. It could be something tragic like the unexpected death of a child. Or being laid off at work, forcing drastic lifestyle changes that the couple hadn’t anticipated.
9. One person eventually becomes insufferable
We are humans, and so our behaviors and personalities evolve to some extent throughout our lives. The person we are at the start of our relationship is not the same person we become 20 years later. We’re shaped by different events; we lose motivation to be productive; we turn into slobs. Sometimes relationships can end because their former partner turned into a real hot mess. Substance abuse problems. Choosing to be unemployed for three years. Sleeping more than their house cat.
10. Fed up with not being treated well
At the start of the relationship, there is a tendency to focus entirely on the good side of your partner while ignoring all of the red flags. And then at some point when their nasty side does become an issue, it becomes difficult to break up out of fear of being alone, or thinking they can do something to change their significant other. But people can only take enough abuse before they finally decide the relationship isn’t worth it, so they put an end to it.