Telltale signs that tell you it is time to break up (for your own good)! (3 of 4)

You get angry around them

End it if:

Your partner is the reason behind your anger. Does being with your partner tick you off?

If being around your boyfriend or girlfriend makes you get irritated at their little knacks or faults, then it is time for you to decide what direction you want your relationship to take. If they trigger you and produce annoyance in you even when you are in the best of spirits, then it is definitely not a good sign.

Work on it if:

There is something else that is at the root of your outbursts. If it is just that your work or family stress is making you angry, you might be deflecting those pent up emotions unintentionally on your partner. This is a Freudian coping technique, known as displacement, whereby you substitute your boyfriend or girlfriend for the frustration you feel towards your actual stressor. And haven’t we all suspected our parents of doing exactly this when they punished you excessively after they had a bad day at work?

It is necessary for you to sit down and decide what is exactly causing these irrational reactions from you – identify what is setting you off. You also need to work on how to stop this defense mechanism from kicking in and lashing out on your partner unnecessarily. No one likes to live in a hostile relationship.

You no longer want to get intimate

End it if:

You never ever feel like getting intimate with your partner. The mere thought of sex with them is a turn off for you. If somewhere in your head you feel like “ugh, why them?” then that is definitely an ominous indicator that you no longer derive pleasure or any satisfaction from your partner.

Work on it if:

Despite not wanting sex, you cherish physical proximity with your partner and treasure their company. See, if you still need your partner for comforting you and like them caring for you then the issue may be temporary. Even if you don’t want to have sex, but enjoy physical contact with them like spooning or getting frisky with them, then you may just be suffering from a drop in your libido. Don’t worry – it is just temporary and will resolve on its own.

The constant stress and pressure of work, not being well-rested, or even strenuous exercise all take a toll on our emotional capacity and physical energy reserves needed for us to be sexually active. If you have started taking any new prescription drugs like antidepressants, it is better to consult your doctor about any potential impacts that they may produce.

You prefer hanging out with your family and friends, rather than spend time with your partner

End it if:

You feel that sinking terrifying feeling whenever you think of making any plans alone with your boyfriend or girlfriend. You might be trying to avoid your partner by keeping yourself occupied with meeting friends and family. We all have moments where we feel that yearning for the life you had when you were single. If you miss the thrill of going on a first date and the excitement of flirting, then it is definitely a nudge to you that you are not involved in your relationship and that you are longing to be single. And that’s seriously not a problem, but you need to communicate this with your partner.

Work on it if:

You are actually just missing hanging out with your friends and family. All romcoms have taught us that in the first phase of a relationship, friends take a backseat while your partner becomes your priority. As you start getting comfortable in your relationship, you might feel like meeting your friends more, since you haven’t spent quality time together in the initial phase of your relationship.

If that is the reason, then wanting to hang out with friends is natural. If your partner wants you to not meet your friends, then that is unhealthy. Your partner isn’t your social life. You are in charge of keeping your social and romantic life separate.